Saturday, June 6, 2009

good bye

i wish i had neverfallen in love with u...i didnt know it would be so easy for u to come out of it and so difficult for me to digest that. i hate myself for all that i have done to myself and all the decisions i have taken. i regret it and will regret it for the rest of my life........i wish my life wouldnt get so 'complicated'. i know i am the onlyone who's responsible for all this and i know only i can correct it. i wish i can correct it as early as possible. i am finding it extremely difficult to deal with emotions these days. i have decided to switch off my phone from tom. i cannot deal with the depression whic comes the moment i strt expecting reply to all my messages. I dont knw if that will make any difference to u but i know it will make a lot of diff to my life but i will deal with it. I love you chinnu more than everyone in this world.

Hoping that someday u will realise that i was a dumb girl but then loved u more than my life. I am sure u will nt find another person like me to love u so much.

take care and GOOD BYE!

Saturday, May 16, 2009

eshto varshagalada mele nin jote matadta idini ansta ide. ondu maatu kella? ee badalavane ashtond avashyavagita? agiteno nange gotaglila ansate:-( nindenu tappila naane sari illa. eega aa magugoskara nadru ninna maribeku? alwa? sorry chinnu adu naninda agala:-( idu nanna tappalla.
Nan manasu opta illa. eshtu avna jote hondkolake trymadidru nange agta illa. aa magu mele baruva priti nishkalmashavadadu like u said atleast that should get my uncompromising love! and yes he will get that. but dear, my love for u can never die. i know u have stopped caring for me. The day i got admitted it was like i was in a hell and my only wish then was to speak to u once only once so that even if something happened to me i would die peacefully. but u know when u called me i somehow felt that disconnect. i felt u no more cared forme. but then i also felt may be its just my feeling and its not lke that.
I waited for u to respond, i know it wasnt a moment of celebration for u like it was for my family but then i thought u will atleast be concerned abt me an come to see me the veryday but u didnt i waited and waited but u never came. the tone which u spoke just didnt have any feelings towars me:-( i knew then everything b/w us was over forever.
You have decided tomove on and u have successfully moved on. I am the one who is stuck here not knowing wat to do. I have messed up my life completely. I alsways believed my life was the best and i will make it great but i failed chinnu i totally failed. I made wrong decisions all my life an i can never forgive myself for this.
But u know life is there no matter wat happens i have to live it and i know i have to live it without YOU. I just want to congratulate u for ur new and happy life. I completely undertand u have to move on and gotta lead a life. Wish u all the best. i just want to tell u one thing. u will be only love and no one can take that place of urs.
I love you

Thursday, May 7, 2009

muddu

hey chinnu,

nange ode ondu request ide en gotta? nan deliveryge hogodrolage onde ondu sala muddu anta karitiy pleaseeee:-( i long to hear that from u but nange adanna nin hatra helake dhyrya illa:-( huh! eno ella ontara eno sari ila ansta ide:-( i just hope this misery ends....take care

i love u always

nanu

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Neenillda jagatinalli kavitegalu huttuvudilla

novugalu saayuvudilla...
Neenillada edeyalli haadilla

Neenillada angaladi haseyilla
Neenillada koralalli daniyilla

Neenillada hakkiyali iniyilla
Neenillada kaleyalli natyavilla

Neenillada tolalli appugeyilla
Neenillada irulalli taregalilla

Neenillada kangalali kanasilla

Neenillada nannalli nanilla

Chinnu,

I am missing you terribly....wish there could b few words thru which i could describe how much pain i am going thru.....i love you tumba tumba tumba.......cant we ever ever be like before:-( i am sorry to ask u this but nange agta illa ninna bittu iroke....life feels so scary...i know this is wrong and u will never want me but nange eno gotilla eneno yochne barta ide....uffffffffffff......i love uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu and ONLY YOU:-(

love

chetu:-(

Saturday, April 18, 2009

hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii:-)

en madings? I am missing u a lot today! dont know y wish I could just get out of this like u have managed to come out of it:-( but yako sadyane agta illa. I am feeling stuck here. Sometimes i wonder how miserable my life is now and how miserable it would be in future. I couldnt be a good daughter, not a good girlfriend, not a good wife and now not a good mother too:-) what a tragedy alwa.....ok enila sumne yako eneno thoughts barta itu just wanted to actually tell u that I love u a lot and willl always love u......

i love you chinnu

take care

Nanu...

Sunday, April 12, 2009

wierd feeling

Some strange feeling kano....
I dont know after a long long time i felt like wrritign somethng for u....tumba aloo barta ide ivatu sanje inda eno kasivisi. I dont know the exact reason, tale ella bhara bhara ansta ide...ello eno sari hogta illa ansta ide kano:-( i know its not true but yako i have a feeling u had gone to see some girl today.
May be i am wrong, i hope i am wrong but then some wierd feeling and its just upsetting me. i tried my best not to feel this way but i am so sorry i just couldnt help. I msgd all possible friends, spoke to everyone possible just to kill time but then u know for me looks like the world has stopped.
I need to learn to distance myself from u, i cannot go on like this. i have to let u free, let u move on but dear i dont know why i am getting so selfish. why do i want to keep u for myself, why do i stillbelieve that u love me and only me:-(
I should accept the fact and reality that u dont love me anymore wy am i not been able to accept thta...cant someone just put some sense into my dumb head:-(
ayyo nange jorag attu bidana ansta ide kano.....uffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff wish i just die this moment:-( good night and I LOVE YOU tumba...............................